"You carry around philosophy books you haven't read and wear trendy wire-rimmed glasses even though you have perfect vision. You've probably added an accent to your name or changed the pronunciation to seem sophisticated. You hang out in coffee shops because you don't have a job because you got your degree in French Poetry. People who drink tall americano are notorious for spouting off angry, liberal opinions about issues they don't understand."
Find your personality type at Jennifer Bishop Fulwiler's The Oracle of Starbucks.
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